How will these thoughts affect my actions?

Will I act without thinking?

Do I need to stop thinking and start acting?

When do I put these thoughts into action?

Do I want these thoughts to be how I act?

Am I sure I want things to change?

Who cares? I guess I’m trying to physically make record of what I believe or what my thought process is on certain things. I care because for some issues I really don’t know with 100% certainty, if that is such a thing. I want to at least try to reach some sort of conclusion of not only what my beliefs are, but also why. Also to make myself vulnerable to hearing other views to gain a firm grasp on the why.

I’m not too concerned about trying to gain attention, maybe just find those who are like minded, or learn from others points and conversations. Also, to give those who know me personally, a view into my mind, since there are seldom chances to partake in a lengthy debate or deep conversation.

Fight Club, one my favorite books/movies, has inspired or maybe just describes why I enjoy and feel the necessity to write out how I think, why I think, and what actions are needed. Like in Fight Club, Tyler Durden is the person the narrator wishes he was. Take out the extreme nature of the story and we all fight against how we’d like to react versus how we actually react. Which side is in control? Which side is better to follow? Do I act without thinking, or do I think without acting?  What is the course of action? I like to take some time to reflect and see which version of myself I am or would be more happy with.

Reflection and new experiences are key aspects to developing my opinions. Several chapters of my life vary from one to another due to my changing view points. Ignorance, environment, self-confidence, all were variables in the formula of my beliefs at a given time. I do not understand why changing beliefs or opinions is seen as weakness. I understand people like consistency, I can understand how being easily persuaded shows weakness, but I don’t see change after reflection, personal debate, and learning new view points that cause a change can be viewed as weakness.

Everyone acts differently to the vast ocean of waves that crash into us daily. Through conversations, news stories, current events, and that asshole who is tailgating me. Either we act aggressively, conservatively, based on our current mood, or we brush it off, accept it, and learn something from it. What is the best way? Why is it that certain situations require a certain response? You should, or should have, done this or that, more or less, stood your ground or compromised more.

What do you want out of your action? People to view you a certain way? You being satisfied with how you handled yourself? Acting in a way that will result in the least amount of criticism or hindsight?

Some of these questions have to get answered in the blink of an eye. All the answers we give are sometime hard to take back. What’s more important developing the thoughts or developing the proper action?


Published by Jr. Flood

I realized that it's better to have more than just a notebook full of words no body will ever read. Perhaps, next to no one will read these words, but life is better when it is shared. I welcome the insight and remain humble towards any additional ideas not yet learned.

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