How did I do? How do I look? What do you think? Can I get your honest opinion? Don’t hold anything back!
Now, I don’t claim to be a person who gives it to you straight, who doesn’t care about your feelings, or who only cares about the way I see things. However, I do often wonder if it would be better if the majority of people did do such things. To be nice or honest, which one is actually better to do?
Motivation is key to doing anything. Even with something as simple as taking a shit. Your colon will motivate you to stand-up and get yourself to a bathroom. Which form of motivation is better, positive or negative? I guess it depends on the person. Personally, I use both, but if I dissect a little further it basically comes down to how much I actually want to do something. Even some times when everyone is positive and encouraging towards motivating me, I eventually realize that it doesn’t matter what they say, I should have listened to myself in the first place because I didn’t want to do this.
If someone who weighs 300 pounds approaches you and starts talking about running a marathon fairly soon, what is the better way to approach the situation? Say, “yea you bet, good for you, you can do anything, I believe in you!”. Or based on there lack of ability to move from a sitting to standing position. You instead give them an honest assumption of how every part of their life, that you have witnessed up to this announcement, in no way leads you to believe they are or ever will be capable of completing a small flight of stairs let alone a running a marathon.
What if you chose to be nice to the over weight individual? What if you did a very good job at motivating them by being nice about it? You gave 110% of you personality to really convince this person that they can indeed get up tomorrow morning, or even in a months time and run a marathon. They wake up give it everything they’ve got…………heart-attack, disappointment, cramps, the belief that nobody around has the courage to tell you how it is.
What if you chose to be honest? “Go look in a mirror, try to find you genitals, try to do 10 jumping-jacks, and do all of this without any form of sugar going into you mouth because looking at you, know I’m afraid you are too fat and physically unfit.” They break-down, leave the room, fall into a great state of depression, and their health slips further away from them.
I know I’m taking the worst case scenario out of both examples. Being nice they could gain the motivation they need, and maybe with a very slow painful pace they actually pull off the impossible of finishing. Or with you harsh but honest words, they appreciate your honesty and re-adjust their goal to a more appropriate time-line.
So all in all, it comes down to the individual mostly. Anyway you choose to approach the situation, by being nice or honest, it will just come down to whether or not the person actually wants to do it. Honestly, are they attempting to do something for the recognition, which in that case is not “honestly” what they want to do; or are they trying to do something “nice” for themselves and will accomplish it no matter how “honest” those around them choose to be.
Think about it.